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The Guide to Body Language

Sexologist, Jessica O’Reilly, discusses how to interpret your date’s body language.

Though there is greater difference among men and women as opposed to between the sexes, cultural prescriptions of gender can create a divide in chasm between the sexes when it comes to dating. You can, however, try to decode your date’s behaviour, language and patterns with a little gender insight.

Body Language:


Running his fingers through his hair: He’s preening for you! He wants you to notice him, and maybe even pay him a compliment. This is especially true if he lowers his gaze, head or chin.

Quick facial expression changes (ie – a quick eyebrow raise): This is the body’s reflexive response to excitement and attraction.

He licks his lips: Another instinctive response, this one occurs when he’s anticipating something good. It may even mean that he’s nervous and the suspense is making him uneasy.

He sways or rocks his body: Back and forth motions suggest he may be associating your interaction with comfort or seeking the feeling of comfort (e.g. the way you rock a baby). If he seems to be lifting his body upwards, this may be an indication of happiness.

Fidgeting: This may mean a few things. He could be bored or uncomfortable. Or he’s trying to hide the fact that he’s happy to see you!

Talks with his hands: This might be a sign that he’s a strong communicator and more likely to be effusive.

Sits or stands with his legs apart: He likes to be in control and is signaling that he’s an alpha male.

He strokes himself: Specifically the face or forearms. When we touch ourselves gently, it often indicates a desire to touch the person we’re with. You might want to take the next step to invite him to do so, if you’re feeling it, too.

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