One of the biggest fears in any relationship is the worry that it could fall apart. However, it's easy to avoid choices that could put your relationship in a compromising situation. Relationship expert Ashley Howe shares three rules happy couples follow to avoid an affair and preserve their marriage!
Happy couples do not put themselves in situations where their judgement could be compromised or they may make a mistake. This means, they don’t have more than one or two drinks when in certain situations. They may also try not to spend any one-on-one time with a person they may have feelings for. This may mean skipping events like going out with work colleagues. This applies even MORE when the individual is feeling angry or hurt with his/her spouse for any reason (as this can be when we are most vulnerable to such mistakes). Happy couples don’t confide personal information to potential persons of interest, about their marriage.
Happy couples use this rule of thumb: “would I do this if my partner were right beside me, or knew about it?” Also: “how would it feel if my partner suddenly heard or saw me doing this?” If those answers are negative, just choose NOT to send that text, or that message or meet for that drink etc, even if the action is seemingly harmless. If something tells you that you would keep some or all of the interaction with this person a secret from your spouse, it is not something you should do. Keeping secrets is the first step toward cheating. If there is something about a situation that you are in, that is a little grey, even if you don’t want to admit it, it can be harmful. When you imagine your feelings if your partner showed up, that can often tell you whether it is risky.
Happy couples don’t “test the waters.” This means that they don’t send that seemingly innocent email or set up that coffee meetup, just to see how they feel. They don’t make tests to “see” how they feel towards someone, or to see how their attention feels, or to see if there is a spark etc. Chances are, if you are not currently in a relationship with someone, and are curious about them, there will be a spark, or the test date will lead to another test date of a different scale. This is because the very nature of not fully having that person or having them in little bits, is the machine that keeps desire alive!!